Journal of the Mad and Lost
by Jadecoyote
Summary: Threw the eyes of a known mad man tells his tale threw the confines of his prison. Mind wracked with the grief of self. Edward Nygma is shown in a new way. His thoughts and dreams put out for you uncensored and dramaticlly real.(r&r)
1. Prologus

Journal of the Mad and Lost

By Jadecoyote

June 27th Arkham Asylum

_My name is Edward Nygma, I am of sound mind as possible in an asylum. Mind and body in bondage _

_of loathing and whispers of unanswered questions. I always thought that there was almost an answer for _

_all things, to modern history to past disruptures. I was never one for these things but kept here has _

_been almost unbearable._

__Standing in front of a mirror,

Seeing who I think I am,

I do not see myself,

What I do is good,

The things my reflection does is bad,

It kinda looks like me,

Made from the same,

From the blood of our creator,

I find he is my reflection,

Doing opposite that I do,

As I try to make peace,

Her is degenerate and causes pain,

My life is my reflection.

Forever in the strain of time

_Crimes commited to solve the greatest riddles of all. There will be a time for these things of course. So _

_I sit here paying my debt to society. The other inmates have no idea what is before them. Once _

_everything is out in the open it will be clear to all. I know this. _Well _journal these things we call passing _

_days wax upon my heart like the moon seen clearly from my window. to deam a forgotten deam._

Edward Nygma once known as the Riddler closes his diary placed against his lap. Letting out a

soft breath he shakes his head a little, the light reflection on hsi fine chisled features. moving his hand up

the slender digits of his fingers move threw his auburn hair. It was night and the lights had been turned off.

Sitting at the edge of the bed his thoughts scattered among the stars waiting for the next day to come....

(More To come Soon)


	2. Chapter 2

The sound of screams reverberated against the glass of the cells, the way the guards looked in making him feel like he was trapped in a zoo. The screams only once and a while bothered him as he sat there lost in his own tormented thoughts. Edward wished he had a window to look out but none were allowed on the inner compound of the asylum. Many thoughts had come to his mind when the days passed into nights. He remembered things that he hadn't thought about in a long time. The picnics in the park he used to have with his mother before she died when he was a child, his brother pushing him down the stairs when he was a teenager, the children teasing him in school. Oh, how he had hated the other students that jealously used to smack him around as he cowered by the brick wall, or trying to take refuge under the bleachers at Gotham High School. Everyone was always trying to bring him down and make him suppress him being himself. Breathing hard he felt he might faint as the memories assaulted his mind. Reaching under his bed he hastily picked up the diary from between the mattress and the metal frame. As his fingers grasped the red leather bound book he heard a familiar voice closing in.

"You would think you would learn your lesson along with Miss. Isley after being captured so many times" the deep voice of Batman caught Edward's attention.

"Yeah yeah" the high pitched voice of Harley Quinn said as she slowly passed Edward's room, hands in front of her handcuffed, blonde pigtails bouncing. Placing the journal aside he approached the glass and stood feeling like a voyeur. As if instinctively knowing that she was being watched the young woman turned her head and gave him a wide smile.

"Hey Eddie-Spaghetti!" she cried causing even Batman to stop. Edward almost wanted to laugh though the nickname annoyed him like crazy(ha excuse the pun). Allowing a faint smile to grace his lips he merely shook his head at her. Edward felt that she did not belong here. No, she wasn't truly crazy and twisted like the rest of him. Harley Quinn had been a doctor here until the Joker took his clawed hand and turned her mind into absolute madness. She didn't have to be here. Slowly he knew the clowns grip was loosening on her as Harley more and more stayed like a younger sister to the former botanist, Poison Ivy. Letting out another sigh he turned and plopped down on the bed. Retrieving his pencil and opened the diary upon his knee he started to write.

June 29th Arkham Asylum

_I am started to feel the weight placed on my shoulders when it is supposed to be removed. The treatment here in Arkham is nothing but a way to conceal the dirty laundry of the city. You would think that they want us to be better, no its all a trumped up illusion. Many of those who are here can easily be cured if the time was taken. I know that I will never be well. My obsession is too great to even imagine. The Batman who brings us in like a scolding and abusive mother brings us in to pay for our crimes. Does that make any sense at all? A man who dresses up like a bat is allowed to beat up people and no one ever questions the sanity of that? Going along with that train of thought, What is sanity really? The people here are painted as the bad guys yet things seem to be placed on their head. Perhaps this is all a dream like Alice in Wonderland, at least that is what the Mad Hatter would want us to think. Now I do think I am prattling a bit. Another riddle to be spoken and sooner or later solved. I don't know how long I can stand the screams and the doubts assaulting my brain._

_Edward Nygma._


	3. Chapter 3

Edward closed his journal and returned it to the safety of between the metal frame of the bed and the thin mattress. If he ever became sane again he looked forward to a warm bed that wouldn't hurt his back so much. Oh, how he lamented on these things often. It was human nature to try to grasp what he could not have. It was lunch time and he was quite hungry. The food wasn't high class but it would due. Most likely it came from a large plastic bin, the thought made his mind whirl. He never considered himself an elitist but such things as sleeping conditions and good did concern him. The doors had been unlocked by remote control so those who had earned the privilege by good behavior were able to go into the cafeteria and enjoy the lounge.

Stepping out he made his way to the cafeteria and heard the usual chatter of the other inmates. The high risk criminals such as himself and the others Batman had caught were kept separate from the other loonies of Arkham. Getting his tray he started to receive the slop that was given out pretty much each and every day. Letting out a sigh he wrinkled his nose at the food, but his attention was pulled elsewhere.

"Give it back clown! I don't want to see that garbage you have on" Ivy yelled at the Joker as she reached for the remote he held above his head.

"Say 'please' nicely Pammy and I might consider it" the Joker crooned his grin as wide as ever, eyes shiny with malice. Ivy scowled at him and jumped up to reach it again. No longer feeling hungry he thrust his tray aside and walked into the lounge. Ivy and Joker seemed entrapped in a tug of war for the remote control. Harley was on the couch kneeling and sitting on the back of her legs, rocking slightly with wide blue eyes, biting her lip.

"House and Gardens are on you lout" Ivy screeched as she grabbed hold of it, trying to pry it from the clown psycho's hand. Edward sighed and walked between them and suddenly grabbed the remote from both of their hands. Silently he walked over to the couch and sat down starting to flip through the channels. He stopped at Jeopardy and leaned back, snuggling his back into the couch.

"Ohhhh I like this show" Harley piped up and moved to a sitting position next to Edward. He looked over her and a faint smile graced his lips.

"In truth I really had no idea" he said in a pleasant tone of voice.

"Yeah you should of seen her w hen we were free. She used to get all excited when she had to the answer" Ivy said and sighed , running her fingers over her face and collapsing into a nearby chair.

"Harley? She isn't smart enough to know any of those answers. I mean she is as dumb as a pile of bouncing balls" The Joker said and started to laugh, causing Harley to look over and pout with tears rising in her eyes. Edward would of comforted her but he knew that would cause the Joker to get upset at him. Though the Joker claims that he doesn't care for the woman he sure acts differently when she is paid attention to.

"This painter was spent months working on the Sistine Chapel" Alex Trabec said in his usual announcer like voice. Harley jumped up and down with her hand raised in the air.

"I know I know. Who is Michelangelo" Harley cried her whole body shivering with anticipation. The beeper went off and the woman on the television spoke.

"Who is Michelangelo" The woman said and the host said that she was correct, leaving everyone staring at Harley in amazement, except Ivy who tried not to smile.

"Hey I am not some dumb blonde yah know" Harley said and stood up. Edward averted his eyes and let out a deep breath. The Joker really took that woman for granted.

(Heehee that's all I could think of for now. Yes, there will be another journal entry from Edward but I couldn't think of anything to write at the moment. Chew on that and review)


	4. Chapter 4: July 2nd Journal Entry

_July 2nd_

_Dear Journal,_

_I feel like Henry Jekyll from the storybook. I feel like the rational side of me is slipping as I stand behind this glass of lies and web of secrets. The inner demon howls in horror from within. I know that everyone thinks I am a joke here. The mind has always been something taken for granted. _

_Lately I have been having conversations with my neighbor, famously known as the Scarecrow. We banter back and forth on an intellectual level. "Why are you really here?" he would ask me. "Because the world isn't rational. They think with their pockets and not their minds?" I would tell him. "You commit crimes to make money" he would tell me. I shrugged my shoulders looking upon the once brilliant doctor. "Survival is key to human nature" I reminded him with a wistful smile. "Gods plan?"he said with a satisfied smile. You wouldn't think that a scientist like him that was fascinated with fear would believe in such things. "I think God is dead and left his people to waste" I said with a heavy sigh. If God did exist then why would he place such twisted creatures in one city and watch the chaos fall upon innocent people. Yes, I believe there are some innocent people in this city and perhaps even behind these stone and soulless walls. I believe that despite the crimes committed in the name of the Joker, Ms. Quinzel is innocent. She is like a nymphet in the forest. No, not the type that Vladimir Nabokov wrote about in his novel Lolita. I mean the type that live in nature and do what comes to them naturally. Love is what they do and Harley does, love with all their being to the point of blissful excess. Its wasted on a half wit scumbag like the Joker. Well his soul is empty and black he leeches on those around each passing day I feel the Hyde within me threatening to scratch the surface. Of course I could not raise a finger to hurt him. I am not the monster like him. What can I do behind glass and stone? Tear down the very foundation till I find sweet Nirvana. No, there is nothing but the shadow, and the thought, the dream, and hope. _

_Edward Nygma. _


End file.
